February 14 is San Valentino, so there’s no better time to learn a little bit of love language in Italian. San Valentino is a big day in Italy, although less celebrated than in the US. It mostly involves younger couples, and maybe particularly romantic (or [overly?] sentimental or affectionate) ones. Of course, restaurants have their “San Valentino night”, and there are heart-shaped treats everywhere, but it is not as widespread as in the US. Also, there are no such things as Galentines or any other variations. San Valentino is about romantic love. Let’s learn some basic love language, then.
First Thing First: Ti amo versus Ti voglio bene
While in English one would say “I love you” to a friend, a family member, or their romantic partner, the Italian equivalent —ti amo— is only for the latter. You can surely say amo molto la mia famiglia (I love my family very much] as a general statement, but you wouldn’t say ti amo to someone from your family. Instead, you would say ti voglio bene. Ti amo is a big thing to utter to someone, so it generally marks the passage to a big-time relationship (i.e., handle it with care!)
In the Internet/social media/text messages slang, you might see TAT for Ti amo tanto (I love you so much): Ti voglio bene has a lot of variation, the primigenial being TVB (ti voglio bene, indeed) but also TVT*B(add an amount of Ts of your choosing, meaning it tanto—much).
Younger Italians also use many expressions taken straight from English, from I love you to crush, as well as some adapted from English, such as ghostare, friendzonare, and ti lovvo.
Young people may call (best) friends amore or, often, amò and amio/amia—this last variation is from a Tik Tok trend. But ti amo is still usually reserved to a romantic partner. Ti adoro (I adore you) might be used instead in a non-romantic context.
Let’s Keep Talk Love
While it’s not possible to list all the words, verbs, and expressions related to love (from innamorarsi [to fall in love] to perdere la testa [to madly fall in love, literally to lose one’s head], abbracciare (to hug), baciare (to kiss) to the sweet coccolare [to snuggle]), have no fear: isn’t Italian per se the language of love? One of the most romantic languages, with an unmistakable loving rhythm and with a history of beauty, love and passion? You could even memorize a poem, like the one —simple yet deep—from poet Patrizia Cavalli:
Ah l’avessi saputo
che bastava un bacio per aprirmi le vie dell’universo:
stelle e pianeti che si incrociano
parlando, costellazioni intere
che si intessono.
E io in mezzo a loro che le guardo
tessile ordito ardente
che reggo, e non domando[1].
[1] While translation should not be needed, here’s one nonetheless: If only I had known / that a kiss was enough to open the paths of the universe to me: / stars and planets crossing / speaking, entire constellations/ weaving. / And I, in the middle, watching them, / weave a burning warp / that I hold, and do not question.
By Claudia Quesito
Also read:
Italians named Valentino on February 14 celebrate la festa degli innamorati
